The Book Process: Rejections From Publishing Houses

What does rejection feel like while on submission?

It's completing a 5k in record time and then realizing that you've only just begun The Great Wall of China.

It's rock climbing and making it to the top of the hill; when, alas, you stand and fall instantly into quicksand.

It's the feeling of falling from the Eiffel Tower and never stopping.

It's yelling into oblivion, but the words never escape your chest. 

It's the absolute worst and somehow bittersweet.

I've made it this far, but there are still so many hurdles to jump over; there are acres of unmarked territory. The unknown is terrifying.

My literary agent is hopeful and determined, and the editors who have read my manuscript have had many positive comments--which is kinda weird to me (weird in that I forget that editors are actually people sometimes).

Though their comments have been laced in sweetness, none have requested an R&R (revise and resubmit), and none have requested an offer of representation. They love the writing, they love the main character, but it's still not the "right" fit.

I find myself reading their comments over and over again, trying to find some hope.
But, ya'll, it is hard.

It's just one of those really nice rejections.

So all in all I have less than 10 rejections, which really isn't all that bad, but again, this waiting game can be horrific. 

That's all for this one.

Till next time, blog world.

Writing Hacks: Should I Pay For An Editor? (Traditional Publishing)

Short answer: no.

Absolutely not.

Hear me out, though. If you are hoping to go the traditional route, you should never--under any circumstances--pay for an editor.

If you are self-publishing, the situation is different, my friend (this is an entirely separate blog post that needs to be conducted).

So, in general, let's take a brief overview of what this process looks like for a writer who is wanting to get traditionally published.

You wrote a book. This is good. This is the first step. (Enter thumbs up emoji here.)
But, you are concerned that the book you wrote is up to no good. This conclusion came to you after sending 5.1 million query letters to literary agents, and receiving a rejection for them all at the same time, causing an explosion of some sort in your inbox.

Well, we most certainly don't want that.

At this point, you are looking for alternative options. You worked hard on this manuscript, it's your book baby, and you need to find a way to make your dream of becoming a published author come true! But you keep getting rejections, so you probably think it's your manuscript.

Truth: it might actually be your manuscript. Also truth: it might just be timing (sometimes the world isn't ready for your book right away. There have been many people--myself included--who have waited years and years before they got a literary agent. And then, even after that, there's still a waiting game to find editors. See more here.)

The thing about having a sucky manuscript is that sometimes our egos are bigger than our dreams, and it creates an overcast on the truth that simply is, "this book kinda sucks." To make sure we aren't full of ourselves, we need to make sure we have a group of people keeping us in check. These are critique and beta readers. In most cases, these folks have done a fair share of reading/writing, and they can truly help you craft your book into magnificence. (Here's more on how I've used beta/critique readers in the past.)

You can usually find critique/beta readers in writing forums like Agent Query Connect, or in groups you've joined for writers on Facebook or even Reddit.

In addition to this, beta readers and critique readers should ALWAYS BE FREE OF CHARGE.

If they ask for money, it's a scam.
If they promise to get you on the NYT Bestseller list, it's probably a scam.
And to be honest, it's probably not a scam, but still, they shouldn't--under any circumstances--ask you to pay for it.
It should always be a solid, "no" if they ask you to write a check.

It is, however, normal for them to want to do a book swap. This is where they promise to edit and revise your book, if you promise to edit and revise their book.

You can even do a chapter by chapter basis. Or, you can do a test trial to see if you'll work well together.

Again, these are services that you can find for free in writing communities, and I don't suggest you seek to find an editor to revise your book in hopes to land a literary agent.

In the realm of traditional publishing, the money always flows back to the author. This means, after you write a stellar manuscript, and you land a literary agent, whom then helps you land a rocking editor at a publishing house, you do not pay for these services up front (of course editors and literary agents get paid--they work for that percentage in those contracts, but maybe this is a different post for next time). The money you get from a book deal is yours (except for what you have to give to Uncle Sam for taxes, of course), and you do not give the money that you have already been paid back to an editor or an agent. Again, money flows to the author, and the agent & editor's cut has already been taken out.

So there it is, writing community. Don't pay for people to edit your book before you've received a literary agent. Instead, take advantage of the free opportunities you have in the writing world, such as beta/critique readers.

Edit: I've had a few people throw daggers at me in the writing community for voicing my opinion on this. I know. *shrugs shoulder* It's my personal opinion.


I hope this blog post helps.
Still have more questions? Leave a comment below.
Like these posts? Share them in your writing community; it helps me know that I should make more.

Till next time!

Writing Update: The Latest Manuscript!

In my last post, I mentioned I had developed, drafted, and completed a brand new book while waiting to hear back from editors on my first (agented) manuscript.

Phew. (that felt like a mouthful!)

I also promised a post about it, so here's that promised post!

So, as you know, I've been on submission for some time now (here's more about the submission process and traditional publishing), and they always say, "if you're on submission, make sure to be working on a new project!" (At least, I think they say this??? *shrugs shoulders*.)

And, as suggested, I started working on a new project.

I developed the idea for this project in November of 2017. After I told my literary agent about this new idea I had, he suggested I create a blurb for it and develop a synopsis. (I know, I know, a synopsis sounds sooo scary, but it's not as intimidating as you may think! Here's a post I wrote a while back on how I develop a synopsis.)

By November 28th of 2017, I had completed my synopsis of this new book idea and sent it over to my agent.

He loved the idea, and though I should have continued to work on it, I was soo caught up in edits for the book we were sending out to publishers, that I put it on the back burner.

Blah.

All this to say, I didn't actually write the first chapter of this book until April of 2018. (Gasp!) I tested the waters by sending it to one of my faithful beta readers, and she had so much positive feedback that it lit a fire in me and got me writing again.

Thanks girl, you know who you are.

But, by the summer of 2018, life got chaotic, and it was hard to carve out time to write. My writer's block was on a whole new level of ridiculousness, and even when I tried, I barely got a sentence out of me. It continued like this through October of 2018, and by the Holidays, I had lost my job due to some bizarre misclassification case (it was a nightmare). I didn't find a steady job until the end of January (which, btw, my new job is great!), and after that, I found myself ecstatic about life again. The concept of creating new worlds in my head through books and writing was where I wanted to be.

By February of 2019, I was writing almost everyday. My main character in this new book was practically screaming words into thin air for me, and I needed to get everything written down as quickly as I could. For weeks, this book was all I ever thought about. It stuck to me like a terrible virus, and the only way to rid it was to complete the manuscript. (Like, I couldn't even sleep in on the weekends--that's how menacing this new book was! And, for the record, I loooveee sleep.)

By March 4th, I was able to partner with my beta reader/editor to work on drafts with me as I continued to work on the manuscript.

Then, by April 8th, my doctor diagnosed me with Dry Sinus Bronchitis. (It was the worst.) She prescribed me three types of medication, and she also suggested I change my allergy medicine (guys, my allergies are killing me this year--anyone else feel this way?).

With all this new medication, I couldn't focus at work, so I stayed home for a couple of days--terribly sick--and I wrote from sun up to sun down. My dog and my boyfriend were worried, but the words kept coming, and it was hard to sleep!

On April 11th, right before midnight, I sent my agent a delirious email about how I'd finished the book and how excited I was. This was on a Thursday evening, and the poor guy probably thought I'd gone bonkers (plus, the months of April/May are usually pretty busy for those working in the publishing industry. There are many events!).

And on Saturday, April 13th, I had finished self-edits of my manuscript, and the first draft of the book clocked in at a little over 54,000 words.

I sent it over to my agent immediately, and he confirmed that he received it on Monday, April 15th.

You guys, I am BEYOND excited for this new project!!!!!!!!!!!
I can barely breathe when I think about it. Can you tell???

Anyway, last time I sent a full manuscript to my agent, it took him two weeks and three days to read it (I know, I'm a wee bit crazy).

It has officially been one full week, and I'm hanging onto the world by a ledge as I await commentary.

I'm not even sure how many details I can share on this new book (because contracts and whatever), but I developed the idea of this book from a word I had come across--monachopsis (mawn-a-khop-sis). It means: the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place.

And as fate would have it, my main character is a time traveler (cue another gasp here!).

So again, I'm not sure how much I can share, but here's an aesthetic I've created for this book. You are more than free to develop your on theories on what you think it might be about.

I'm wishing and praying and crossing every finger and toe I have in hopes that this book makes it through the submission process successfully. 

Ultimately, and for the last nine years, my dream has been to get my stories into the hands of readers. 

So, more than ever, I'm really hoping for a breakthrough. 

Friends, wish me luck!

I'll keep you all updated with this new adventure. 

Still have more questions? Leave a comment below.
Like these posts? Share them in your writing community; it helps me know that I should make more.

Till next time, blog world!

And of course, Happy Writing. :)

Writing Update: On Submission

So, like, being on submission kind of sucks.

But it's also exciting.

It's a strange dichotomy.

Recent insta post: check it out!

Here's what they don't tell you: "Once you've found a literary agent, you must then submit your manuscript to a publishing house. You may be an overnight success, or you may never succeed at all."

It's a bit bonkers.

I've been on submission for two years now (it could be more or less, but it's been so long, I clearly can't remember the exact time frame).

In this time, I've drafted, developed, and completed an entirely new manuscript (more on this to come!). My agent is still very confident in the book I have on submission, and I feel he will work tirelessly to get it into the hands of the world. But as the clock only continues to turn, I truly believe that the current book I have on submission is hard to sell because it's not a high-concept commercial YA (side note: is anyone else struggling with this, too?).

Long story short: the world can't handle it, y'all.

This is such a strange journey, too, because at any given moment, my dream could be made into reality, and in that same moment, it could be turned into dust (hard stuff to swallow--literally).

Anyway, that's the official, official, update on where I am in this lovely writing process.

Hopefully (all fingers and toes crossed), I'll have another book on submission soon!

Again, more to come on this new manuscript. But also, is anyone else struggling with being on submission to publishing houses, or being on submission with literary agents?
Share below!

Still have more questions? Leave a comment below.
Like these posts? Share them in your writing community; it helps me know that I should make more.

Till next time, blog world.

Aesthetic Book Series: Meet Noah

Welcome back to another Aesthetic Book Series blog post.

Today, we get to meet the main character of Rubatosis, Noah. 

Noah Dean Turner is seventeen when he leaves home to find the true meaning of life.

Noah. The MC. The boy that walks around with his heart outside of his chest--in more of a literal way than figurative way. The story chaser and adventure seeker. The one on the hunt to discover the meaning of the world and the truth behind it. The book requisitioner and superhero of his own story, though he hasn't come to terms with it yet. The one we're rooting for

"Noah considered taking off in that instant. He could easily leave through the back door and run as far as he could till he hit the woods. No one would find him—he would be perfectly lonely. 

But he paused at the back door, letting his hand rest on the knob. Noah could see all the land from where he stood. He could see the rows of vegetables that would never be picked and weeds that would never be pulled. He could see his life out there, his future, and his granddad’s words ran through his head."

That's all for this one!

Stay tuned for next week to meet the next character! 

Aesthetic Book Series: Meet The Book

Writerly friends and readers from all around,

Due to my constant Twitter distraction, (that and being on submission) I have been inspired by the #ThursdayAesthetic hashtag. This has fire-started a pretty cool series to introduce you all to my debut novel, Rubatosis: The Unsettling Awareness of One's Own Heartbeat. 

That's a complete mouthful, I know. 

Though the title may be subject to change, the characters, and so on and so forth . . . I thought, what the heck, might as well get you all excited for this book since that's all I've been talking about on here for the last few years or so anyway. 

With this series, you can expect to see some stellar book aesthetics for each character in the order that they're introduced in the book. 

To kick it off, I will start by introducing the book with an excerpt from my query and #pitmad tweet that got me my agent. 

Find the goodness below. 

(Fun fact: this is actually take two of the main aesthetic, go here if you want to see the original.)

#PitMad Tweet: A boy with a timer on his heart tries to overcome his death sentence by making sense of the world through books.

At eleven-years-old, Noah Dean Turner learns that he has ventricular tachycardia, a potentially life threatening arrhythmia that causes his heart to beat twice as fast.

With the support from his granddad, Noah makes it to year seventeen. Long hours in the garden and reading thick books has provided a distraction to his inconsistent heartbeat. But when Noah's granddad passes away, and he's forced to move in with his promiscuous aunt, he hops on a bus in hopes of finding a place that he can call home. Instead, Noah is dropped off at a retreat center called Camp Neodesha. There, he realizes two things. One: everyone's story parallels to a book he's read. And two: falling in love with a broken heart is, in fact, as deadly as it seems.

RUBATOSIS: THE UNSETTLING AWARENESS OF ONE'S OWN HEARTBEAT can be summarized as Alice in Wonderland meets The Fault in Our Stars. This story isn't just about a boy with a death sentence, it's an adventure story about growing up, a story about finding love and meeting radical characters that help Noah make sense of the world, including a boy who steals, a kind stranger that smokes hookah, a domineering mother figure that owns a smiling cat, and a girl with wild hair and heterochromia eyes that makes Noah forget about every good book he's read.


*Wipes off sweat* 

Phew. Alright guys, that's the overview for good ol' Rubatosis. 

I hope you like it. I'd love to see any that you may have as well! Drop your links in the comment section below, or tag me on Twitter!

Next week, you'll get to meet Noah, the main character. 

Andd if you didn't know . . . Noah's pretty great. 

*wink, wink*

Before I forget, if you want to know more about my query, and those that helped me form it, check out my AQC link: http://agentqueryconnect.com/index.php?/topic/34139-rubatosis-update-on-post-24/?hl=rubatosis

Till next time!

The Book Process: Beginning to End (Traditional)

It has recently dawned on me that many of my close friends and relatives have no idea how the book process works.

Now that I'm represented by a literary agent, I get random emails and comments that go something like:

"Hey, Britney, when can I get a copy of your book?" or, "Hey, can you send me a copy of your book cover when you get the chance?" or, "It's so cool that you have an agent, when can I expect to read something of yours?" or "Oh, are you still writing? I thought you got published months ago?" Or "Are you sure you're still getting published? I don't know about you, but I'm pretty sure the process doesn't take this long. You should check in with someone, like, seriously." Or, "You're sure--like absolutely sure--that this is still happening, right?"

My response to these questions vary, and I struggle on how elaborate I should be when it comes to informing someone on how this process works.

Then I find myself getting agitated when I have to constantly repeat myself; my tongue literally triple folds into knots, and at some point, I finally realize how glamorized media has made the publishing process. In movies, writers go from drafting a book to being multi-millionaires over night.

That is not how it happens.

So today, I have decided to dedicate my morning to writing about how this whole book process works when someone has decided to take the traditional route of getting published.

This might be a long one, guys, so buckle in.

First, and foremost, a writer must have a finished book. And by finished, I mean it's been edited a gazillion times by beta readers, critique readers, and possibly many random people they may have met in a writing forum going through the same experience as said person.

When the writer feels like their manuscript is free of errors (as much as it can be), they begin doing research on literary agents who might like their manuscript and who represent their genre. (Click here for an older post on how I used to research agents. Also, click here if you're thinking, "what the heck is a literary agent?")

This can take anywhere from a couple of hours to a few weeks, depending on the writer. 

But before they can send their book to a literary agent, they must complete a query. As many writers already know, queries can take form of the devil sometimes. It's a one page summary of the manuscript condensed into 400 words or less. This query has to be concise, appealing, and close to perfect. (Perfect: an ever-changing adjective that differs from person to person--so yeah, good luck on perfecting that query, my friend.)

I'm not going to lie, though, I've developed a soft spot for queries overtime, and they're not as scary as they seem. (For more about queries and how they haunt writers' nightmares, click here.) 

So once they have a polished manuscript and query, they can send it out to literary agents. 

This is where rejection hits hard. Depending on the agency, some agents receive hundreds of queries a day. Many of these queries never even see the agent because they might be filtered by the agent's assistant, and most queries will receive a form rejection (for many different reasons) that goes something like: 

Dear Britney,

Thank you for your query. While your project does sound interesting, I'm afraid it's not quite right for me at this time. I genuinely appreciate your email and wish you luck finding an agent who can successfully champion your work.

All best,

Yes, this is an actual rejection that I have swiped from my inbox.

To be quite frank, many writers fall under the weight of rejection, and they lose sight of why they began writing in the first place. Some writers stop writing all together, or they choose a different route of getting published.

But, some writers actually hear back from an agent, and if a literary agent is impressed and confident in their work, they will offer to represent them in this crazy world of writing. (For more on how I found my agent, click here and here.)

And yet, that's still not the end of it.

After contacts have been signed, the agent and writer work hard together to shape the manuscript into greatness by going through more rounds of edits. These edits will vary depending on the agent and what condition the manuscript is in. Some will ask to re-work a few chapters; some might ask for a synopsis if one isn't written yet. This process can take a few weeks or a few months.

Once the manuscript has gone through more edits, the literary agent will begin to submit to editors in publishing houses. (You've probably heard of Random House, Penguin, or Simon & Schuster, to name a few.)

Hearing back from editors can take a long time because, just like literary agents, they are getting multiple submissions in their inbox on the daily. They are also looking for specific works that they feel confident in and that they believe will make a hit in the market.

This can be a doozy for many writers because they'll probably find themselves refreshing their inbox on multiple occasions, hoping they've heard back from their literary agent with good news.

And when the time finally comes, the writer will be get a phone call from their agent stating that some editor wants to publish them! (This is, of course, after the agent has negotiated the author's work.) Soon, another contract is signed, and there is it, they have officially began a whole new process.

Even after a writer has signed a book deal with a publishing house, it could still take up to two years before they ever see their book in print form! *gasp*

With an editor, a writer goes through a few more rounds of revisions (and then that version of the  book gets edited by many other people in the publishing world) before a final draft is created.

I promise, though, this process grows to be a great one because while all this insanity is happening, many people are making sure the book looks phenomenal across multiple formats, and there's a whole team of people who are working on how to market the book and tailor it to whom they think might be the perfect audience for it. All the while, there's another group of people reading the book and creating a stellar cover for it.

Finally, the book is complete; the book release date has come; and the author finally gets to hold their book in print form.

And this, friends, family, who ever has made it this far into the post, is why I still do not have a book in print form to give you.

I promise, something is happening.
It just takes time. A lot of it, to be exact.

I hope this answers your questions on how the book process works; this whole publishing thing is a bit bonkers.

Still have more questions? Leave a comment below.
Like these posts? Share them in your writing community; it helps me know that I should make more.

Till next time!

How Writers Made It BIG: Gillian Flynn

“Every author kind of secretly wants their book to be made into a movie,” said New York Times bestselling author, Gillian Flynn.

https://www.rollingstone.com/movies/features/gone-girl-author-gillian-flynn-i-killed-my-darlings-20141003

Gillian and I have two things in common: writing (but of course), and Kansas City. So it's no surprise that I wanted to do a post on the kick-ass, story guru from my hometown.

Like most aspiring writers, Gillian found herself writing between working. At the time she was employed as a film and book writer for Entertainment Weekly Magazine.

“I would write for a while and get busy with work and not write for awhile,” she said. “I was covering movies at the time so I was flying all over the place to film sets everywhere."

https://www.theodysseyonline.com/read-gillian-flynn

By 2006, she published her first book, Sharp Objects. In 2009, she published her second book, Dark Places. And by July 4th, 2012, her third book hit No 1 on NYT bestseller list after only a month of its release. If you ask me: she was gone, girl. (ha, get it?)

Okay, okay, dad puns aside, Gillian sky-rocketed with her novel, Gone Girl. With the unexpected twists and turns, and the enticing tale of her main characters' toxic marriage, the book was picked up as a movie and projected to hit over $300 million before its release.

And that, my friends, is what I call real-life goals.

Now at 47, all of Gillian's books are optioned for film, and she has officially clocked in at one of the world's top-earning writers. Can someone say, cha ching?

Why Gone Girl worked for Flynn:

Well, Gillian says, "Oh, I finally figured out how to write a book." That, and she was able to tackle the push-pull dynamics between a long-term relationship from a woman and a man's perspective. This story wasn't exactly a happy story, and I think the realness of it contributed to its success. 

Who is Gillian's Agent?

I couldn't find a ton of information on Gillian's publishing/querying story. I imagine, since she already had some great credentials under her belt with her prior job, she was seen as a pretty legit writer. She was picked up by the Leving | Greenberg | Rostan Literary Agency--try saying that three times fast--and was agented by Stephanie Rostan. Her books went on to be officially published by Penguin Random House. 

How can we learn from Gillian?

We can learn from Gillian by knowing that even if our debut novel doesn't do as good as we hoped, we can still make it to the top by continuing what we love: writing. 

We can also note that killing our darlings isn't a bad thing--it's a superb move. 

References:

https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/2012/10/08/gillian-flynn-

interview/1610623/http://www.chicagotribune.com/suburbs/skokie/news/chi-skr-gone-girl-author-screenwriter-visits-skokie-amid-wild-run-20150119-story.html

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2014/oct/03/gone-girl-phenomenon-gillian-flynn

That's it for this blog post, friends!

Drop a comment below on your reaction, or an author you'd like me to cover next time.  

Till next time, blog world. 

And remember: don't stop writing. 

What Happens After The Agent?

What happens after an agent has offered you representation?
Complete bliss, of course.

I'm kidding.
Sort of . . .

You see, one thing I haven't read a whole lot about is the process one goes through after an agent has offered them representation.

For forever, it feels like, I've been so caught up in just getting an agent. So when I was offered representation, I didn't know what to do.

I smiled, sure, but what were the protocols?

Here's what I learned:

Step One (this is actually version two of step one because the first obvious step is to celebrate):

After an agent has offered you representation, it is courtesy to give other agents you have queried time to consider you. I received awesome advice from a friend who had recently been picked up from an agent as well. She found this link, and it was helpful for me as I dug through my sent emails to let other agents know what was going on. Giving agents one/two weeks to respond is average.

I also used this format from the website above:

"Subject: OFFER OF REPRESENTATION (Title) (Category) (Genre)

Dear (Agent’s name),

I am writing to let you know that I have received an offer of representation for my (Category), (Title), which I submitted to you in (month). I am reattaching the full manuscript for your convenience below. Do this, it’s easier on everyone

I am looking to close out all pending submissions by the end of business on (date). If you are interested in the manuscript, please let me know before then. I’d be thrilled to discuss it with you. If you need more time, please do let me know.

I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you again for your consideration."

Step Two:

In this step, for me, I asked a lot of questions. It's so important to know who you're working with and what you should expect in this journey.

Definitely take time to write down questions that are important to you. Even if you forget, hopefully your agent is the kind of person that takes questions year round.

Step Three: 

At this point, I did more contemplating. I did more research on agents, and I gave other agents time to respond. I asked more experienced writers what I should expect, moving forward. I took time to get my head together.

I felt good about my choice of agent.
I also felt confident in the mission Rossano had planned out for me.

Step Four:

After receiving the contract, I read it over a few times. It became one of my best friends. I also had my grandmother look over it for her wisdom, and I handed it over to my boyfriend to look at since he's a paralegal and deals with many more contracts than I do.

And when I felt confident, I signed it.
Then, along with other members of the TZLA family, I was added to the author's list.

And the list continues . . .

Step Five (the step that constantly repeats itself): 

Edits!

This is probably my favorite part of the agent process. It's great and all to receive feedback on your book from your friends and beta readers, but receiving feedback from an agent is all the more insightful! You get the good and the gritty. You get to know why the agent was compelled to choose your MS, and you get to learn what you need to work on to make your MS all the more appealing to publishers.

To wrap it up, I hope my experience has helped all of you as you journey to find agents, choose agents, and begin the editing process.

This is my personal experience, and of course, everyone has a different story. Heck, my story isn't even finished yet. :)

However, I do love hearing from all of you.
Feel free to share your agent stories below!

Till next time!

Representation . . . What?!

Ahhhh, Writing friends!

It has happened.

One month later, and here were are. A literary agent wants to represent me.

How crazy-exciting is that?

I've waited years for this moment, and all I can do is smile and dance and try not to yell too loudly.

I have soo many questions--most of them starting and stopping with the word, "how".
I am thrilled and so full of awe.
It's an amazing feeling to know that someone who has been working in the industry for so long finds potential in my work.

I'm in a small state of "wowza-land" . . . . (I'm pretty sure I just made that up.)
But in all seriousness, I am at a loss for words.
.
.
.

In other news, another agent liked my #DVpit tweet!

It was by luck, honestly. I had accidentally used the #DVpit hashtag a month too early while I was participating in #PitMad. Then, as carried away as I get, I forgot to participate in #DVpit and was super bummed about it. Literally. I probably stared at other pitches for about twenty minutes, sulking in what "could" have been. I left twitter alone for a while after that, and when I checked my notifications yesterday, I saw that an agent wanted me to send over my query and the first ten pages of my MS. This was the SAME DAY that I was offered representation.

Imagine all the freaking out.

Of course I sent over my query and pages, as well as let her know about the offer. The next step for me is to contact all the agents I've recently queried, letting them know that there is a deadline ahead.

I'm nervous and will be using help from here to send out the right email formats.

Let the query wars begin.

 . . . also, still freaking out over here.

#PitMad What?!?!

So, it appears I've started looking for agents again . . . 

This time, I had luck!

Friends, did you just hear that?! Seven years of queries and finally . . . FINALLY.

Okay--so here's the story: It's no surprise I've been sitting on a completed manuscript for a little over a year now. After the first round of queries and rejections, one could say I lost my confidence. I mean, this is my THIRD book, numerous rejections, and all I can think is, "I need a break."

After months of my boyfriend persuading me to get back out there, I began querying again--small publishing houses and agencies this time. I conveniently hop back on Twitter five days before #PitMad, and . . .

This is where the freaking out begins.

It's been years since I've participated in #PitMad. Thankfully, a lot of the writers I follow on twitter, kept mentioning #DVpit and #PreDv (go to this link here to learn more about it), and #PreDv gave me the chance to practice my one-liner before #PitMad. I acquired some pretty great help from @JenniferZeynab, @KatCho and @JL_Dugan. Then, the next day, just a couple of hours before my West Coast Swing class, I get a like from an Agent.

*Insert internal screams here*

After a few more moments of freaking out, I put on my focus goggles and start researching this guy like crazy.

I like what I find, so I send over my query, and I'm so nervous that I forget to mention word count and genre.

The next day at work, I accidentally open my email and find this:









More freaking out:

At some point I decide to get my crap together and send over the requested MS.
And now, here I am, waiting.

I'm so, so nervous. I'm nervous and excited. I've got all my fingers and toes crossed and God is probably tired of hearing my prayers.

Even if he decides to eventually pass, I'm just happy I've gotten this far.

So here I am, writing friends, I've entered another realm of waiting.

Wish me luck.

The Year of Beauty and Chaos

 Somewhere between beauty and chaos there is existence. 

The seasons change rapidly, the sun runs to meet the moon, and the stars chase the hills as the earth rotates.

In the midst of that, there's me
Little ol' me.
The rambunctious me, the sad me, the overly-excited me, the constantly changing me.

There's the me that wants to write until the flowers crumble and the snow comes, and then there's that side of me that can't do anything but watch a Netflix series I've seen three times.

There's the me that wants to write this blog, and then there's the me that wants to be the best dancer in the world.

There's the me that sings in the bathroom with an acoustic to my chest, and there's the me that wants to crawl into my bed and sleep all day.

There are so many sides to me, so many different talents, so many dreams--and somehow all of that has lead me back here, to the start of my writing phenomenon, to the beginning of my beginning, to my writing daze.

Here, I welcome you all back into my life as I try, again, to enter the writing world.
I will warn you, writing friends, it is tough.
I've sent more queries out, I've tackled a synopsis, and I've even checked out more writing venues.
I have failed and failed and failed in hopes to help writers--like us--who won't give up.

I hope that you all follow me on this new journey.

If any of you are interested in my recent novel (I'll post a query soon), I've posted a few chapters on Wattpad.
If any of you are interested in being a beta/critique reader contact me through email or in a comment below.

To all of you going through seasons of writing, I'm pouring my luck out to you.

Until next time, writing friends.

Querying Rossano Trentin

Also known as the Literary Agent who believed in my dream . . .

http://trentinagency.com/en/about-us/

Here's what you should know about Rossano:

He's a top-dog literary agent from Italy. He's the founder's of Trentin Agency. According to Manuscript Wish List, Rossano represents YA and Adult Fiction, with a special affinity for literary Fiction, crime, dark thrillers, high-concept women's fiction, and contemporary YA (including thrillers).

Fun fact: Rossano was also one of the superb agents that helped Ransom Riggs (you know, the guy that wrote Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children) get Italian rights. *high-fives* As well, one of his clients was recently optioned for film!

From the man himself: "I am looking for well-crafted and compelling stories that features a strong narrative voice. Beautifully written and suspenseful works that captivate the reader with its prose and its plot. I am also looking to acquire science-fiction that explore what it means to be human in the age of technology. I’m very interested in everything about A.I. in general, and I love reading and seeing things about it.When it comes to nonfiction, I’m open to fresh and smart narrative nonfiction in the areas of journalism, politics, true crime, TV/Movie and sport."

Have you queried Rossano Trentin? How did it work out?

Yes and no. I sent my query letter to Rossano Trentin after he requested it via #PitMad. (For the full story, click here.) To my surprise, he liked what he saw and requested the full MS the next day.

What was the response time?

In full: Trentin requested my query, synopsis, and the first two chapters on September 7th. On September 8th, he requested my full MS. On October 6th, he offered representation (*insert squeals*), and on October 24th, I officially became part of the TZLA family. It all happened so fast, I still have jet lag because of it. There are moments when I'm like, "Britney, girl, you have a freaking Literary Agent. That's Crazy."

Would you ever query him again?

Ha, if I had to, I suppose I would. I honestly wish I'd heard about him sooner. (Hints to why I'm doing this post. *wink wink*)

How can I query Rossano Trentin?

You can query Rossano by emailing him at rossano@tzla.it

His submission guidelines:

"Please email a cover letter and provide a two-three pages synopsis, with ending, along with the first two chapters of your novel. Copy and paste letter, synopsis and chapters in the email body, as we won’t open unsolicited attachments. To avoid falling into spam, please begin the subject line with the word “Query”.Please don’t query if you haven’t finished your novel yet, be sure to include genre and word count in your letter, and let us know if you are sending your proposal to other agencies or publishers. Unfortunately, we can’t respond personally to all submissions, but if we are interested in your work we will certainly follow up by email within 8 weeks."


Bonus:

Follow Rossano on twitter, and send him a shout out!
Also, check out the featured post about me and another one of his new client's here. 

P.S. I thought I'd mention that Trentin represents foreign writers, too! Don't fret if you're not from Italy--send your queries his way!



That's all for this blog post--I've got to get back to editing. As always, let me know what your experiences are with these agents! Good luck with the queries!

Till next time blog world!

A Maddening Sabbatical

Dear Writing Friends:

Is it too soon to say how much I love all of you?

Ha, but seriously.

Even with my absence of blogposts, I've felt a sincere adoration from those of you who have taken time to comment on a post with a question, or to compliment my writing--or even those of you who send emails! (I love emails!)

I've always been honest with all of you, and the truth is that I've mistakenly placed myself on a sabbatical (is that even a thing for writers?)

School is seriously hectic. Graduation is etching so close, and with life pressing in on every side, I can't find enough time to write a decent post.

My book, Rubatosis, is complete and is going through many rough drafts and edits by my dear friends, including the awesome Kayla Dean who I met on here, and who is also an amazing writer and literary friend--check out her blog! (And also, shout out to you for being so astounding!)

Y'all, I am ridiculously stoked about Rubatosis, and I can't wait to share more with you. I will say, however, the query editing process is CRAZY. I've been having to go through old blog posts I've written about queries--I'm basically relearning how to write a query, and it's maddening. (Note to self: never stop writing/reading queries.)

I'm also excited about the many new agents I've come across, and you can bet I'll be writing about them on here.

Until then, hold on tight, accept my awkward GIF hug, and know that my sabbatical will end soon!

Writing with Depression and Anxiety

I don't know if I've ever told the blog this, but I have anxiety and depression. 

Fact: I've never been diagnosed by a doctor. Fact: I know myself well enough to describe how I feel. 

Medically, Anxiety is described as a nervous disorder characterized by a state of excessive uneasiness and apprehension, typically with compulsive behavior. (Trust me, I've had my fair share of compulsive regrets.)

And Depression is described as a mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and hopelessness as well as a lost in interest. 

Together, the two of these can create an explosion of chaos within each other. It's like mixing two great colors together but constantly getting brown. It's somewhat frustrating. 

The thing about the two of these mental illnesses within myself is that sometimes I feel more anxiety than I feel depression, and sometimes I can't pinpoint why I feel the way I do--like why I'm happy now, but how I can be stuck in a mood two days from now.

Though I've sought help for these problems, I've found that writing is a saving grace. I wish I could thoroughly explain how writing makes me feel--the endorphins that are released--but I can't. I wish I could sit inside of your chest, so I could simply show you because I know it'd be easier that way.

But writing literally opens me up in a way that's terrifyingly beautiful--like crazy beautiful. I mean, have you ever written while in a mood? You get some psychotic scenarios, but you also get really extravagant ones, and you wonder how the hell that happened, but then you end up with an entire chapter based off one sentence.

It's completely magical.

This post isn't particularly special, but I felt the need to share my experience on writing with depression and anxiety, and how having a mental illness doesn't have to hinder you or your dreams.

Honestly, I bet you could reach the stars if you wanted to.

Here's a clip of writing from my latest manuscript, Rubatosis. Every aspect of this book is covered with my inner problems, and I'm okay with that. Everyone should be.

"She watched the sun in the distance, fading west, and she took note of how it touched every surface. Nothing was left behind, not even her eyes. It was all these small things, and she wanted to cry. Was it that bad, she thought. Was it so, so very bad that she couldn’t see? Maybe this place really did hold the key that drove people mad, and all it took was a turn and one small thing. The past moments mimicked a kaleidoscope in her head, and what she realized was that she wanted to spend this time with Noah, and she set off to find him.
Ila walked to his shack, still pressing her arms against her abdomen, and she didn’t knock when she entered the dimly lit room. Noah acknowledged her presence. He was seated on a rocking chair in the corner with his guitar in hand. He played a gentle melody, and the tune echoed against the walls and vibrated in her ears. The chord progression he chose mimicked the wings of a bird in flight, and he picked the strings intricately before he began to sing. Then he closed his eyes as the words of the song took him away to a place of serenity and heartache.
Ila sat on the ground before him, legs crossed, and she studied the shadows in his face. His eyelashes laced together; his uneven lips opening and parting to the lyrics, and his facial expressions slightly changing with the chords. She could tell that his passion for music was fueled by the brokenness inside of him, and it was one of the best things she’d ever witnessed. In this moment, he was more of the moon than he’d ever been, shining so brightly in this darkness they’d created. She had a hard time fathoming how he existed in her world. Up to this point, she had heard him sing multiple songs, but she still hadn’t grown tired of it. She was obsessed with his voice and the power behind it.
Noah rocked in his chair, moving to the tempo, and the song went on for minutes. They didn’t speak. He didn’t open his eyes, and he was relieved that he didn’t have to answer her question to where he had been the last few days. After all, there was no such a thing as a good lie."

Till next time.

WANTED: Beta and Critique Readers

Friends, I've done it. I'VE COMPLETED THE MANUSCRIPT. 
(Refer to previous blog post where I sign my name in blood and make promises, here.)

What this simply means is that I need you. I need everyone's help. 

I am in search for a few beta readers and critique readers to help perfect my manuscript so that I can begin the agenting/query process. 

If you've ever been in search of an agent, then you know exactly where I'm coming from. 

Here are the basics: 

Beta Readers: I need beta readers for content of the manuscript and feedback. Does the manuscript hold a solid theme that prevails to the end? Do the characters develop in a correct manner? Could you relate to the characters in a way that would make you want to purchase the book?

Critique Readers: I need two critique readers who love dealing with grammar. I'll admit, I haven't been too particular with comma placements in this first draft, and you'll probably find a homophone or two. But that's why I need you. Along with grammar, feel free to judge the content too. Every little bit helps. 

The novel is about 54,000 words--give or take. Though I haven't started the query process, here is a rough overview of the story, Rubatosis: 

At ten-years-old, Noah Dean Turner learns that he has a disorder with his heart. The sound is more of a tripled thud-thud-fail than a resounding steady drum. Paralyzed by this new truth, Noah becomes determined to find the missing piece of logic in the world. He wants to know if his life, and everything in it, amounts up to anything at all.

 By Eighteen, Noah has collected over one hundred books. The words and characters stain his brain, morphing him into a boy with a knack for music, an interest for birds, and a deep addiction to literature.

 Quickly, Noah discovers that many of the books he’s read relates to the people he knows, so he labels them, giving them stories that play out in their actual life. But after an unfortunate series of events followed by the death of his granddad and living with his promiscuous aunt, Noah sets out to discover his own story. By chance, he comes upon Camp Neodesha, a retreat center where many people go for solace, but where Noah is slowly going mad.

 Then Noah meets a writer. From her one green eye to her one brown, Noah doesn’t understand how she makes sense in the world he’s created for himself. Worse than that, however, is that Noah can’t seem to figure her out; he can’t place a story on her that he’s already read. His desire to unveil her only brings him closer to her, but Noah knows that he is fatal. He is a ticking time bomb, and at any moment, he feels his heart could literally beat right out of his chest.

It is best to contact me here: http://agentqueryconnect.com/index.php?/topic/33765-chapter-by-chapter-swaps-rubatosis/ 

But if you don't have an Agent Query account, feel free to leave a comment below or fill out a "Contact Me Form" in the right column.

I'm really excited about this, friends.

Wish me luck as I push onward.

Warmest Regards,

Britney

Rubatosis: The Unveiling

If you follow my blog at all, you are well aware by now that I am knee-deep into a new manuscript.

This, ladies and gents, is the unveiling of it.  

But really, this is nothing new. I've had the characters in mind for a year now. I've actually written them into two other stories, before this one, and then deleted it. 

I was struggling, bad, but I was so in love with my characters--Noah specifically--that I wanted to make it work. I knew I had a story for him. So March of this year, I was finally able to figure that story out, and in about a week, I finished the synopsis. 

Then, something weird happened. 

And when I say weird, I mean weirder than that girl showing off her dance moves to the Frankenstein-looking guy in the GIF above. 

I met the main character of my book. 

Yeah, go ahead and re-read that sentence above, people! I freaking MET the MAIN CHARACTER of MY book! How bizarre is that?!?!

Let me explain as thoroughly as I can. 

A year ago I produced the idea of my character, Noah. (I had previously named him Theo--meaning God's gift--but it was super corny so I changed it.) The first image I'd ever had of Noah was that of him sitting on the porch of a small farmhouse, watching a swarm of birds fly by, they were migrating south. I was so intrigued by this character that I immediately wrote down everything I knew about him. For example, I knew that Noah was interested in birds. He was curious about them, and he wanted to know why they did what they did. I knew that Noah was an adventurer because of it--he's an explorer of many things--he likes to learn. I knew that Noah could sing and play the guitar, and along with that, I knew that he had a deep love for books. He collects them, and he spends most of his time reading them. He actually connects with them so much that he is able to relate the stories he's read to the people he's encountered in real life. Deeper than that, though, I knew that Noah was broken. At a young age, he had already experienced so much life, more than anyone he knew, and it made him rough around the edges--a depressive by nature. I also knew that Noah was a lover, and a genuine guy just trying to figure out what life entails. But there was one thing I knew about Noah that would carry the theme of the entire book: he has a condition with his heart that causes it to beat two times too fast. It's how I got the title. When rubatosis is defined, it means, the unsettling awareness of one's own heartbeat. 

Perfect, right?

And then I met . . . we'll call him Jo.*

Before I met him, I was already warned that this Jo character had a mild obsession with birds. In fact, that's all I knew about him for a couple of weeks, and, to be quite honest, I didn't think anything of it. When I met him at the church camp I interned with this summer (yes, this is the one from last summer as well,) I knew that Jo and Noah were very similar . . . and this was after he explained to me how birds reproduce. I didn't realize it all at once--though there was a turning point when I was like, "what the hell? Is this actually happening right now?" 

Here's a timeline of things: 

*note: I've already had Noah written out for about nine months up until this point. 

Three weeks into the summer: Jo and I become friends. He's reading this book to me about science (He's an Environmental Bio major,) and about half an hour into it, and after he's already asked, "are you sure you want me to keep reading out loud? I could do this all day, but I don't want to annoy you," about a thousand times, I find myself wondering if, in fact, he could do it all day. So I ask him, and for some reason that I can't remember, he takes me to the trunk of his car. When he opens it, inside lies a little more than fifty books spilling from this old duffel bag. There was probably more. He told me that he had plans of reading all of them this summer. That he just really liked reading. That day I remember quoting, "You remind me of my book character." To this he said, "Are you writing about me?" My response: "Yeah. I guess I am." 

A few days later: He walks into the dining hall and starts playing his guitar. He was good from what I could tell. Then he began to sing, and I about lost it. The kid is freaking amazing. Like, go record an album immediately, amazing. 

Sometime in the middle of the summer: At this point, I've known Jo for awhile, and I gather that he's a very passionate, very thorough, person. I also learn that, like Noah, he's endured a lot of heartaches in his life. Because of it, it's changed his perception on how he views people and the outside world. 

Toward the end of summer: Now, this is the part that baffled me the most. I'm in the kitchen, yappin' about something unimportant, and out of nowhere, Jo says, "Yeah, I have a heart condition." He tells me that as a child, he went to get it checked out multiple times, but at some point he got tired of it. He learned that he had an abnormal heartbeat, and I'm pretty sure he was so nonchalant about the whole thing he said something along the lines of: "If I die, I die."

I was so freaked out about everything that I about died. Literally, right there. And I tried to tell him that he was Noah, but he didn't understand. 

Then I tried to tell anyone who would listen to me. I felt like I was going crazy, and I needed to process what was happening. 

People understood, but they didn't. Not really: I met a character that I made up in my head. These things don't happen often--if, ever. As I'm writing this, I'm still completely baffled. Noah is so real, I can touch him. I can touch him and know that every good and bad thing about him resides in my friend, Jo. How is this possible?

And besides some of the obvious facts, there were many other similarities that made them alike, even down to the exact, same, complicated eye color. I told myself that if I didn't finish this book, then I was a literal idiot. God had somehow allowed me to spend the entire summer with my book character, and if I didn't use those experiences, I'd just be wasting myself. (God's gift, huh?)

So here I am, about two months later and about three hours into writing this, swearing to whoever is reading this, and to the world, that I will finish this book, this year, by December. I will do whatever it takes--even if that means writing one thousand words each week. EVEN if that means that I have to sacrifice sleep, chocolate, and boys. 

It will be done. This is a promise. 

To conclude this very long, drastic and dramatic blog post, I will sign my name in blood (not really, that's completely impossible.) 

Here goes:

I solemnly swear to abide by all promises listed above--yes, even the one about giving up boys,

Britney S. Lewis